Just an update on things with my mother’s estate, in the hopes that someone else in this situation may be able to get some help from it.

Because she pays mortgage and taxes on a condo in Southern California, both of which are due within a week, my lawyer petitioned the court to grant me special administrative rights to Mom’s estate while aiting for probate to complete so that I can begin collecting money to pay for these things. After a couple of snafus, I finally got the original docs as well as the death certificates last week, but my attempts at opening an executor’s bank account have been repeatedly thwarted by my own lack of organization. I’ve been trying to keep all of the docs together in a single folder, but I keep inevitably leaving one or two out. Here’s what you need to open an executor’s account:

• An original or certified copy of the court letters testamentary or special administration
• The tax payer’s ID (or EIN) for the estate (not your SSN)
• A certified copy or original of the death certificate

If you forget one or more of these items, no dice. I should have them all today, so I should be able to finally get the account open and begin collecting her assets.

I also still need to close out her utilities, a credit card or two and her car insurance policies. Fortunately, she had her finances more or less in order since she only purchased her home in May. A good friend is currently doing some work on the condo to make it more salable. We’ll probably attend to that early in 2006.

I’m still dealing with her death from an emotional standpoint. The holidays really suck. I have very fond memories of holidays past, and they all involve her. Christmas was one of her favorites, even though she didn’t celebrate it quite as fervently after I moved up here. I think she may have been looking forward to decorating her condo, though. The other night, Danielle and I began decorating our house. We hung the stocking we bought for Mom a couple of years ago when she opted to come up and spend the holidays with us rather than have us go down there. I sobbed as I hung it.

The worst feeling right now is this weird guilt I have for not calling her. There’s like a timer in my head when it comes to calling her. She usually called me on Sunday nights, so I never felt like I had to make too much effort to give her a ring - I’d just wait for her call. If she went a week without calling, I’d start to get a little anxious and, eventually, call her myself. It’s been almost a month since I last spoke with her, and that timer is going off loudly in my head - “Call your mom! Call your mom! Call your Mom!” And, of course, I immediately remind myself, “Can’t call her, not anymore.”

See? Captain Buzzkill.

I expect this whole thing will leave me being a moody bastard for a while. I apologize in advance.