I just posted a query about Dell’s pricing over at my TechKnowMe blog. The bottom line – a Dell Axim, configured with the exact same add-ons, is $80 more expensive through their “Home and Home Office” portal than through their “Small Business” portal. What gives?

In other news – I’m buying a Dell Axim! Very excited. I’ll post reviews.

Dear President Bush,

Congratulations on your declaration of January 22 as “National Sanctity of Human Life Day”, a truly splendid way to celebrate the life we all hold so dear. This declaration is long, long overdue. After seeing those aborted baby fetuses that those pleasant pro-life groups threw at my car as I drove through downtown last month, I must say that I agree that abortions are just bad. We probably shouldn’t stop there, though. Since we’re telling women what to do with their bodies, I genuinely believe we should enforce a law that requires all women over the age of 18 with a cup size of less than a “C” to get silicone or saline implants or, in the very least, begin some kind of hormone therapy. And, of course, we need to do something about the fatties. With all of the breast enhancement and lipsouction jobs we’d create with this legislation, the abortion doctors should have no problem supplementing the income they’ve lost to killing babies, and America will stand not only as a paeon of virtue but of beauty as well. You’re so brilliant, though, that you’ve probably already thought of this. Kudos!

As part of your celebration of the “Sanctity of Human Life”, I assume you’ll also be withdrawing our troops from the war zones in Iraq and Afghanistan. This is a remarkably noble gesture on your part and I believe it proves to those doubting naysayers that you are, truly, a compassionate conservative. I can’t wait to see our troops, now safely out of harm’s way, reunited with their families at every airport. It will make those anally violating strip searches your administration imposed at the metal detectors all the more worth it.

Naturally, you’ll also be working tirelessly to reduce poverty in our nation’s inner cities. After all, there are babies dying from malnutrition and drug overdoses right here in our own country! Your commitment to save them and prove that you are, in your words, “creating a society where every life has meaning and our most vulnerable members are protected and defended” makes me want to weep with tears of joy and exultation. You are truly a magnificent man.

We have already witnessed your gracious and respectable commitment to the sanctity of human life in your selfless act of reanimating Mr. Cheney. It is thrilling to see him at the top of his game five years after being declared legally dead by those liberal wackjob doctors at Johns Hopkins. Once you’ve cured him of his fear of fire, he will be 100 percent again. Just amazing! I can’t wait to see how you reanimate your popularity with this latest crusade!

Keep on doing the good work of the American people, Mr. President. If you need some help furthering your commitment to life, drop me a line. Even if it means I’ll have to impregnate a few young, newly attractive American women to prove my dedication to this cause, I’ll happily serve my nation. Anything for you, Mr. Bush.

Sincerely,

Rob Zazueta
Red-Blooded, Proud American

Read these quotes. Many are powerful, interesting and highly intelligent. I’ll let you know who said them when I’m done, as they may unfortunately color your interpretation of them (this, by the way, was lifted wholesale from ericjohnson0 on a thread in Fark.com):

“Above all, we must realize that no arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. It is a weapon our adversaries in today’s world do not have.”

“All great change in America begins at the dinner table.”

“Coersion, after all, merely captures man. Freedom captivates him.”

“Don’t be afraid to see what you see.”

“Entrepreneurs and their small enterprises are responsible for almost all the economic growth in the United States.”

“Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn’t pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children’s children what it was once like in the United States where men were free.”

“Freedom is one of the deepest and noblest aspirations of the human spirit.”

“How do you tell a communist? Well, it’s someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It’s someone who understands Marx and Lenin.”

“I call upon the scientific community in our country, those who gave us nuclear weapons, to turn their great talents now to the cause of mankind and world peace: to give us the means of rendering these nuclear weapons impotent and obsolete.”

“I don’t believe in a government that protects us from ourselves.”

“I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I’m in a cabinet meeting.”

“I know in my heart that man is good.
That what is right will always eventually triumph.
And there’s purpose and worth to each and every life.”

“If you’re afraid of the future, then get out of the way, stand aside. The people of this country are ready to move again.”

“People don’t start wars, governments do.”

“Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book.”

“Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.”

“The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away.”

“The government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.”

“The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’

“The ultimate determinant in the struggle now going on for the world will not be bombs and rockets but a test of wills and ideas-a trial of spiritual resolve: the values we hold, the beliefs we cherish and the ideals to which we are dedicated.”

“There are no great limits to growth because there are no limits of human intelligence, imagination, and wonder.”

“Thomas Jefferson once said, ‘We should never judge a president by his age, only by his works.’ And ever since he told me that, I stopped worrying.”

“To sit back hoping that someday, someway, someone will make things right is to go on feeding the crocodile, hoping he will eat you last–but eat you he will.”

“You and I have a rendezvous with destiny. We will preserve for our children this, the last best hope of man on earth, or we will sentence them to take the first step into a thousand years of darkness. If we fail, at least let our children and our children’s children say of us we justified our brief moment here. We did all that could be done.”

OK, so who apparently said all this? Ronald Reagan (here’s the Fark thread). If you’re a conservative, you just slammed the table and yelled “I KNEW IT!” If you are, like me, a liberal, you just threw up a little. Reagan had one hell of a screen speech writer.

I just gave a quick look to my stats from last month and am noticing a relatively large number of folks hitting my RSS feed. If you’re an active subscriber to the RobZazueta.com RSS feed, would you mind sending me a quick email letting me know a) who you are, b) how you found me, c) why you’re subscribing to my RSS feed and d) one big thing I’m not currently talking about that you think I should talk about. This is all purely for personal curiosity reasons and potential site improvement. If you’re NOT reading this through the RSS feed, drop me a line anyway and let me know. The more I know about why you’re here, the better I can make this place. Thanks a ton!

Garfield hasn’t really been all that funny in years. I haven’t yet decided whether this is a flaw int he comic or some side effect of maturity (Garfield used to crack me the hell up as a kid, even though I had no idea what was going on half the time).

I think Jim Davis may want to consider pulling the levers on his comic and see what he gets. I got this hilariously, yet slightly vaguely inappropriate, comic full of innuendo:

From the “I wish I had thought of it first” file:

This one’s been around for a short while now, but it looks like it’s winding down: The Million Dollar Homepage. So, first you’re amazed that folks are paying $1 per pixel to advertise on this guy’s page. Then you’re amazed at just how friggin’ many folks have actually done it, apparently getting the creator to the $1 million mark he shot for. Impressive, very impressive. Then you start thinking, “Damn, why didn’t I think of this?” Then you start thinking, “Damn, I could rip this off!” Then you start looking at the ads, figuring out who you should target first. Then you realize a fairly large percentage (i.e. greater than 1%) of the multitude of ads are for (drum roll, please)…

PIXEL ADS FROM COPY CATS!

It’s so meta it’s making my head hurt… pixel ads on a pixel ad site, apparently the original, advertising pixel space for pixel ads for another pixel ad site. Click on one of those ads and what do you see? Maybe three or four ads and a whoooole lot of nothing in between? My favorite is the one promoting “affordable pixel ad space”. Love it.

The most clever, in my opinion? First, find Waldo on the page, then click him. Great use of both an old meme (where’s Waldo?), a relatively cheap pixel ad, and the Amazon Affiliate Program. I wonder how that person is doing on that.

Look, I’m a reasonably nice guy so I’m going to give CNN the benefit of the doubt and say that they’re probably not trying to milk the tragic trapped miner story for all it’s worth and that the promo enticing the reader to watch the video of this story in this snip is really just an unfortunate accident (highlight is mine):

One year ago today, I was laying in bed dehydrated and hallucinating from a nasty flu bug that forced us to cancel a huge New Year’s Day party we had already done all the cooking and prepping for. It was a lousy way to start a year.

I turned 30 in February and went a little off the deep end over it, concerned that I was not quite living up to expectations – mine or anyone else’s. I’m still working on changing that.

A couple of months later we bought a house in Concord, which I still view as a good move, but it put us in a bit of a financial tailspin. Money has been extraordinarily tight ever since.

Then Dani lost her job.

A little more than a week later, my mother died suddenly and unexpectedly.

After the way last year started, I went around telling everyone that it could only get better from there. I have never been more wrong in my life.

2005 can suck it. I’m making 2006 my bitch.

I performed a wedding ceremony last night which turned out to be a very positive and joyous way to end 2005 and welcome in 2006. Dani and I drove back from the wedding (in Los Gatos – oy!) shortly after the ceremony. On the way home, we stopped at BevMo, picked up some liquor, hors d’ourves, cheese, etc. and came home and had ourselves a nice little two-person party. With three appetizer plates and various fun experimental drinks for just two people, we welcomed the New Year cuddling on the couch watching a rather sexy movie. No big parties, no drunk drivers, no crazy tales to tell, just two people in love looking forward to another year together and making it better for both of us.

So 2006 is the building year. We’re strengthening our marriage, Dani will get a new job and start working toward a long-term career. I’ll take the money we have received following my mother’s passing and make sure she did not live or die in vain. By this time next year, I intend on being on top, looking back at everything that has happened and being proud that we not only made it work, we made it better. This year, I will exceed expectations.